🚀 The book in 3 sentences:
The author gives a list of 7 guiding habits which will help an individual not only at the personal level, but also with his/her interactions in their work and social life. The first three habits focuses on habits which we can improve on our own at the personal level and from there on, the rest of the habits can be build on to improve your interaction with the rest of the world. While we are working towards improving each of the habit we are reshaping our character to a new one we can dream off because the Stephen sees the character of a person as a collection of his habits.
🌟 Alternate book title I can give to this book:
Personal habits and social/work habits for better life
🗝 The short summary of the 7 habits
This is my small attempt to summarize each of the 7 habits mentioned by the author in three sentences.
Habit 1: Being Proactive 🏃♂️
The foundation of all other habits or even the fundamental way to live a good life is by acting proactively.
Proactive people focus their efforts or act on things over which they have control over, unlike the reactive people which act based on things not in their hands or emotions. When dealing with any problems in life, a proactive mindset follows an inside-out approach, which can be summed up in a simple question “What are the steps which I can take to solve the problem, if any?”.
This mindset is driven by keeping yourself as a center to solve any problem and not the other way where the external factors are acting upon ourself and we got no choice but to react the way the situation demands.
Habit 2: Begin with an end in mind 🥅
Everything you do in life is created twice, the first one being a mental creation and the second one is the one in the reality.
Since the creation in reality follows the mental creation, we can take charge of it and program the mental creation we want as the next five or 10 year goal, or even for the rest of our life.
Once we have the goals well delineated, all of our everyday action will be dictated by the intension which we set of ourselves rather than merely responding to the situations.
Habit 3: Putting first things first 🥇
If habit 2 says we write our own program, habit 3 says that the program execution is also in our hands, which also govern the second creation or the reality.
While we do not have much control on the urgent, important and pressing things that demand our attention, we should maximize the time we spend on things which might not seem urgent today, but we know deep within us that this is an important task which has high returns in the long run.
The tasks which are important in the long run will more or less reflect the priorities we set for ourselves in the habit 2.
Habit 4: think win/win ✌
When making any deal with a second party, the best solution will be the one where its a win/win decision for both the parties.
Any other solution such as win/lose, lose/lose or lose/win might give one party a temporary victory but in the long run since it will not be of the best interest for both the parties, its a loss for both the parties.
Achieving a win/win solution is feasible when we do not think of everything as a zero-sum game, which is a scarcity mentality, but instead we have abundance mentality where we believe that by compromising a little, the two parties in the deal can gain a lot more.
Habit 5: Seek first to understand, and then to be understood 🙊 (something I struggle with a lot)
During any conversation, a lot of people (me included) are listening with an intend to just listen or with an intend to reply back or the worst of all only listening to the parts where we are interested.
However, the best way we can make the second party feel most comfortable in expressing themselves is when we listen to them with an intention to understand the topic from not our frame of reference, but theirs; and that will involve not only listening to their words but also observing their body language and their emotions.
Once the second party feels that they are being genuinely heard and they will build a trust with you, then you can make your point more easily.
Habit 6: Synergize ♻
In making a deal, we should realize that their is no absolute right or wrong answer, and that both parties can be right in their own frame of reference.
The key here to realize that their can be a difference and to acknowledge the difference which will help in achieving a better solution.
When you value the differences, you will say “Good, we see things differently! help me what you see” and only then we can find the right solution which is not “my way ” or “your way “but “our way”.
Habit 7: Sharpen your saw 💪
The author recommends everyone to spend 1 hour a day in training ourself in the four dimensions: physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally/socially.
Physical improvement is via exercise; mental dimension can be improved by reading good literature, journaling, and planning; spiritual dimension by meditation, value clarification and studying; emotional/social dimension by service and empathic listening (habit 5)
The improvement in any one dimension will reflect in the other dimensions and spending time in habit 7 will bear fruits in all the other 6 habits.
🎨 Book impressions ?
- This book is like a bible for the way of living a good life not only in our personal life but also in our work life. Even though a lot of examples from this book are from the cooperate world, the basic ideas is also applicable to any real-life situation outside the world.
- Everyone should read this book at least once in their life, no matter what your profession is.
- Reading the book was definitely challenging for me, but the biggest success will be applying these habits in our day-to-day life.
🧘♂️ How the Book Changed Me
How my life / behavior / thoughts / ideas have changed as a result of reading the book.
Every habit has some activities at the end of the chapter and doing these activities made me realize some of my shortcomings which I could not have realized on my own.
I also found that I am way off the track when it comes to following the habit number 5, and my goal for next 6 months will be to improve myself in doing the same.
Writing this book review and teaching some of the material to my friends was another way to better crystallize the idea of the 7 habits.
✍️ My Top 3 Quotes
Production and the production capability balance is the balance between product (golden eggs) and the producing capability (goose). we have to take care of both to reap the maximum benefits
The most important ingredient we put into any relationship is not what we say or what we do but who we are
Most people do not listen with the intent to understand they listen with the intent to reply. They are either speaking or preparing to speak. They are filtering everything through their own paradigms, reading their auto biography into other people’s lives.
Thanks to Ali Abdaal for the inspiration in starting to write a book summary.
Verma Vivek 